Thoughts and Whispers

Coming back 'coz I missed you

2010-02-24T05:11:00.000-08:00

today we watched " Miss you like crazy", movie of bea and john lloyd...kasama ko college friends ko and i really did enjoy their company.

na-realize ko, dami ko na atang na-mimiss sa kanila...siguro kasi laging ang dami ko gingawa tsaka lagi na lang ako pumupunta sa opis ng pub namin.. siguro ngayon ko lang ulit na-enjoy 'yung company nila ng matagal *haay, anu ba to ang drama naman ng come-back post ko dito..hehe

anyways, dun sa movie, ang dami kong natutnan insights about love..kasi naman ang kwento eh palagi na lang silang nagkakahiwalay. kumbaga parang mali ang timing palagi.. sabi nga ni allan eh (LLoydie) "that time is not a friend" ...and sa akin naman wala naman talagang perfect timing para sa love love na yan dba? *dba? hehe.. para namang alam ko? and then sabi naman nung kausap niya.."in love, time is meaningless" oh dba? tama ako! at dun sa movie there were lots of lessons when it comes to letting go of the one you really love...yes it's a cliche... siguro base na rin sa personal acount ng buhay ko..eh naliwanagan naman ako na totoo pala talaga.. kaya nga naimbento ko ang quote na to:

"we let go of someone because we love them, and if we do not love someone there is nothing to let go."

oh diba parang tanga lang..naisip ko yan kanina habang nanunuod ako. totoo naman kasi na kapag mahal mo pakakawalan mo pero ;pag hindi mo mahal wala kang pinakakawalan.

haay pag-ibig..bakit ba yun ang bukambibig ko ngayon? di naman yon nakakain... bakit nga ba ang daming inlab sa mundo ngayon? o bakit ba hindi pwedeng...ah ewan! ibang usapan na yan..hanggang sa susunod na lang..at least nalagyan ko ng panibagong laman ang page na 'to... au revoir!

pahabol: "ang hirap magmahal sa taong hindi ka naman mahal" - jessie
"move on! mahirap mabuhay sa kahapon!-lizette

wala lang

2010-01-21T04:42:00.001-08:00

WAAAAH!!!!

WALA KO MAISULAT....

:(

My Superman (Who Art Thou?)

2009-04-19T05:01:00.001-07:00

So many times,
Have I asked my myself this.
So many times,
Have I longed to see
Your innocent face, sweet glimpses, simple gestures
Heroic acts…of love.

Who’s my knight in shining armor,
who will defend me by his shield
My Romeo,
who will even face death
My Soul,
who will eternally grace my heart.

who’s the man that I’ll be
sharing my whole life with?
who’s the one that will answer
my happily ever after wish?

I want to wait..
yet I want to see..
the one..
who will my make heart go beating
even though it melts
His romantic deeds that will seize
every chance the world starts singing
the one who will save my heart from bleeding
the one that will make every moment
a sunset scene.

Superman, who are you?
I know you have no mask
but just flying somewhere
above the clouds,
I wanna know, who really is
the man behind your superhero suit.

My Superman, I can wait
in time, when our roads meet
whether will it be on land,
we’ll gonna be together
or even over the clouds,
we’ll gonna fly forever.

Sweet Summer Salad

2009-04-11T02:24:00.001-07:00

Wow! Look at that! Hey wait a minute, the first two pictures are acceptable but I think not for the third. I thought I wasn’t eating salad of any kind. So what does salad has to do with my post? We got to know…

I guess the above pictures is the perfect illustration of how I feel this season. Oh yeah, now I get it. The reason why I picked salad for this post is because of its vibrant character – very colorful, lively and cheerful. All of these (pictures) are a mix of sweet, delightful, and a high-spirited vibe, a perfect description for them.

I love to share this significant feeling with you. What I feel right now is not just for the summer but for all the past seasons my life had enjoyed, struggled for, and learned from. It’s a wonderful adventure for me that I am what I am now because of all the great experiences I had treasured. Just like the scent of the sweet, the summer, and the salad. And I feel so grateful for the beautiful people that I’ve met and the beautiful things I’ve known.

Life, like a bunch of dessert, brings sweetness to those who have the courage to live it. Life, like a sunny day, produces heat just enough to make us feel the warm love of the Lord, and the sweat inducing obstacles, of course, make a person healthy. And like the features of a plate of salad, life certainly is full of a variety of ingredients just to be tasted, enjoyed and appreciated. All these are essential to suffice meaningful life. It may not always be a festivity and it’s sure it isn’t often easy. There were times that there’s a need to sacrifice what we value but what important is that the values we get from doing so. And also, realizing that all we encountered helped us to stand where we are at this moment. Being positive, I guess is the most vital thing we need to survive all the hardships we might get as we travel on the road of life. Positivity is one of the key in achieving our sweet summer salad in which I equate to HAPPINESS.

Memory Mosaic

2009-02-23T00:43:00.000-08:00

Alone

2009-02-15T07:03:00.000-08:00

..I'm tired...
so tired...

life goes on....on and on and on and on and.....

...and as life goes on,
things will be BETTER!

(OST: BOB the BUllDER "yes we can!" hehe)

Now What?

2009-02-15T06:41:00.000-08:00

I have so many things in mind that I want to tell but I don't know where I will start.

There are a lot of things happening and I don't know if I can cope up. I don't know. There are lots of things to say but my mind is beginning to be empty again. I don't know which part makes me happy and I don't know which make me feel lonely. I miss a lot of people. Maybe that's why.

I feel like I’m such a loser. I can’t define what makes me happy even though I know that I’m on the right track. But still, I feel like I left so many things behind. I wonder if this really is me. Things have changed. Many things are not the same as before and I can’t ignore that fact.

At times I may be very happy and I know that those smiles and laughter are true but there’s a part in me that says “you’re not complete”. Again, emptiness becomes my companion though, I know, my friends won’t leave me. Sometimes, I just see myself staring at nothing because I don’t know what to think and what to feel on that very moment. Yes, there are lots of things to say…better left unsaid.

I’ve been really dramatic these past few days and I can blame myself for that. Now what??!

Song For You

2009-02-13T01:01:00.000-08:00

"A little bit" by my super fave acoustic band M.Y.M.P.

i was kinda hesitant to tell you
should i let you know
i was never really like this before
need i say more

or maybe I'm confused when you are near me
i don't know what to do or i should be

there's only one thing in my mind
that's you and me

refrain:
I'm a little bit of crazy
I'm a little bit of a fool
I'm a little bit of lonely
I'm a little bit of all
oh, i need a cure
just little bit of you
and i will fall...

I'm always on the run to see you
would you allow me to
it wasn't my intention to hurt you
this feeling is true

or maybe I'm confused when you are near me
i don't know what to do or i should be

there's only one thing in my mind
that's you and me...

refrain:
I'm a little bit of crazy
I'm a little bit of a fool
I'm a little bit of lonely
I'm a little bit of all
oh, i need a cure
just little bit of you
and i will fall...

When Mind and Heart Clash

2009-02-12T07:40:00.000-08:00

Today is February 12. Tomorrow will be Friday the 13th and the next will be Valentine’s Day which falls on Saturday for this year. I have classes for that day – algebra and accounting – and obviously, it will be a tough day for it’s a whole day of mathematics. Well honestly, I want to be busy that day because I want to forget the coldness that I am feeling right now. (?) I don’t know really if what’s happening to me. Maybe one of my good friends is correct. I may be a bitter.

I said to myself that I need to blog this thing which is right now I’m doing. I don’t care if someone reads this and will discover something about me, if this can make me feel even better then why not?

I must admit, I’ve been thinking of only one person for a couple of months now. I can’t forget that person. He’s been flashing in and out of my mind every now and then. But actually I rarely see him in school since I’ve met him. And I find him a bit mysterious that I’ve become interested about him. Oh no, is it another crush? Rushed crush? Well, maybe not because at first it didn’t came to me too obvious until I saw myself very happy whenever I spot him somewhere in the campus. I don’t want to entertain the idea but I can’t help it. I must be in a fairy land where I thought I could live happily ever after.

I’ve been emoting like this for a week. I’ve been going crazy for different thoughts of him come into my mind. I don’t know if this is right. Neither do I know what he’s thinking about me nor if he does even care about me. I’m going crazy and stupid. My friend says, I should stop because it’s not helping me at all. I always say to myself as well, “asa ka pa, as if naman may pag-asa talaga”. But he’s really getting into my nerves and I can’t take him out of my system. I feel like there’s something good ahead for the both of us but what is that, and how can it start if all I know is I am the one who’s been only dreaming of him all this time. Actually, he also appears in my dreams at night and I don’t want that because when I wake up in the morning I simply regret the fact that it’s only a dream. (!!!) I can’t take this feeling any longer (is that a song?). I am hurt by my stupid self thinking of and hoping for the things that won’t gonna happen. It hurts to see myself with an emotion that is so unbearable.

I’ve never been so helpless and hopeless before. I hate this feeling. But what can I do? Whenever he looks and smiles at me, all the shattered pieces of my heart bring back to its form and my despair suddenly turns into an unquantifiable joy. And I’ve never been so “abnormal” like this.

Can someone please tell me what is it that keeps me being like this? What do you call this thing? And please, can someone tell me if what I am feeling is right because it’s getting harder and harder for me. What can I do to simplify my feelings without telling him so? Is there any way? If this is just a plain crush, why am I feeling inexplicable emotions…?

I always ask myself, “when will I be happy?”

A Rare Instance

2008-09-03T06:04:00.000-07:00

Passed six p.m., just before I got home, I saw this wonderful, majestic view. It’s not always that I see this kind of picture in the sky.

At that time, the sun is about to sleep and darkness is about to rise. Can you imagine how do they look like?

The sky’s a colorful pastel, made of yellow, orange, red, pink, blue and violet hues. How really they are perfectly combined! You can see the transition of the day sky slowly changing into night.. it’s a scene.. so so romantic. If you were also there in my place at that time ( I was inside the jeepney going to our home, and I was gazing outside the rectangular window, thinking of so many things when that picture mesmerized me) you’ll also be amazed. And also try to imagine the perfect shapes of the clouds and their cheerful complexion. It’s like they were there accordingly and were put there precisely where they should be.

Too bad, I wasn't able to take a camera shot.

Try to picture this. The subject is the clouds and the background’s the shade of the colors mentioned earlier. And another important element, the grass below that jams with the cool wind has improved the scenery. Everything’s very novel. It’s like it had been drawn to look that splendid. The whole frame is composed of wild grass that dances as the wind blows and the multihued sky looking cheerful to everyone who sees it.

It’s refreshing to the eyes to see such bliss of nature.

The nature has gifts. They come in surprises. You’ll never know when or where, and what you are doing then.

If we’re going to waste those things that she brings to us, she will no longer give us also this kind of pleasure. It’s everyone’s lost if we don’t conserve her natural beauty, thus, she will die and dwell in her own fortress.

Night

2008-08-15T03:18:00.000-07:00

A glowing evening sky

filled by starlight

as romantic as a ship above the sea

under the silence of the moonlight

beneath that magic of exemptional mystery

yet full of simplicity

and overflowing sincerity...

Buhay Kabataan

2008-08-08T04:05:00.001-07:00

Maingay.

Kanya-kanyang kwentuhan

Kanya-kanyang kumpulan

'yung iba naman

walang pakialam

basta makatulog lang

ang iba naman masabi lang

pikit-mata,walang kibuan

i-pod lang pala ang pinapakiggan

ganyan ang takbo

sa bawat araw ng pagpasok ko

dahil isa rin ako sa mga 'to

kanya-kanyang daldalan

hindi naman maintindihan

sabay-sabay kasi ang usapan

sila-sila nagtatawanan

ang saya nila tingnan?

mga kalalakihan at kababaihan

mapa-t.v., mapa-techie, mga kanta sa mp3

pati 'yung crew dun sa jollibee

lahat pinag-uusapan

ang mga kabataan nga naman

kay rami ng nalalaman

'pag dumating ang di inaasam

'pag naantala ang kasiyahan

magpapalusot, magtatago

aalis, lalayas

bad trip nga naman

pero kammusta naman

lahat 'yan ay bahagi ng kabataan

sana'y isiksik sa ating kamalayan

na tayo'y hindi puro sarap lang

mag-enjoy at umalalay

magsaya at umagapay

napakarami pang dapat matutunan

kaya dapat hinay-hinay lang

huwag kumaripas

at harapin ang 'yong namamalas

steady lang kumbaga

para pagdating ng panahon...

Ikaw na!

There's Always More to Learn

2008-08-08T03:55:00.000-07:00

"I have never let my schooling interfere with my education" - Mark Twain

This is how I interpret the above quote... if someone has already finished his studies, this doesn't mean that his education should also stop there.

School is a place wherein we acquire knowledge for it offers us formal education. Formal in the sense of we're being gathered in a room that our professors, mentors, or teachers give us information to ponder. They teach us how to solve problems and how things are to be done but they don’t teach us how it works. It should be ourselves that must know what to do base on what they have taught us. They don't serve us everything and that we should be seeking for some additional information hence we should be thankful about it- that our parents send us to an academy to have learning. After we have finished our studies in school, that's the best time for application on the career we chose to take and use what we have learned but that point in time does not end our education. Education may not only be attained inside our campuses. We should take it as a lifetime assignment. "Learning has no boundaries". It is a continuous act and in life there really is so much more to learn in a wider and broader reality. Likewise, let me say that our school education is just a "sneak-peek" of the many concepts that we may encounter in the real world. So accept the fact that our colleges require us to take down notes and pass the exams because we will still be doing it in facing the harder triumphs outside. If we open ourselves to the unlimited sources of wisdom in our surroundings, even if we're not in school, life will be as exciting as that of the students.

In addition to the statement of Mark Twain, let also live by the two quotable quotes that would inspire us to continue learning: “Education is a process… Education is growth… Education is, not a preparation for life; education is life itself.” (John Dewey)
“You can not teach a man anything; you can only help him find it within himself.” (Galileo)

Like Mark Twain and all the other successful individuals, let us also not limit ourselves to the four walls and four corners of our classrooms. Therefore we must go beyond that in order to be more educated. We have all the chances because it is never too late and we also have our choices if we want to.

The GAZETTE orientation

2008-07-27T04:25:00.000-07:00

..it was last July 6, 2008 at Tagaytay picnic grove..

that day, i was so excited because i know it would be an enjoyable trip with my co-apprentices and of course with our superiors- ate ann,kuya ryan, kuya lee, ate gemms, kuya lj, kuya jv, and kuya paul. i was right. it surely was an exciting activity not just because of the knowledge that we gained but also with the new friends that we've met.

we had a seminar about news, feature, culture, and sports writings and with photo journalism as well which i find very interesting. each of our superiors gave us lectures and gave us inspiring words. as an aspiring "writer", i jot down notes that i know will be of big help to me as i am progressing on this field. there were also group activities that developed our social skills with our newly- found friends. luckily, because of team effort, and cooperation, our group won,which we call "bombang-tiktik"( i really can't forget this name from ate joan, hehehe), after those tiring yet fun activities.

and one thing more that i've loved about the orientation, everything's no charge...just for us to learn.the foods, really delicious!!!!

i hope there's next time. thanks to you ates and kuyas! hello new friends!!!

Students against simultaneous price hikes!

2008-07-25T02:52:00.000-07:00

... sa totoo lang, ngayon lang ako namulat na nangyayari pla talaga ang mga ganitong bagay, like students protesting for their rights..
Well then, why not? let them hear our voices from our innocent lips yet courageous gestures. We are all part of this country and we are part of the affected community brought about by the simultaneous price hikes.

"skolar ng bayan, lumalaban
militanteng estudyante, magklase sa kalye"
That's what my former classmate who is studying right now at UPLB has texted me. It was during the day when students are rallying in mendiola and in anothar place,(i forgot where, sorry) and I got inspired by it because they are shouting out their voices to be heard despite the police officials who are stopping them. Their protests were about the tuition fee increase and another was about oil price hike. These students are right because the government must be doing some ways for the Filipino people not to suffer.

The tuition fee increase, not only in the state universities but with the private schools as well, are, i think, so much and not reasonable. That is because they should be considering that most of the population of the students are not that rich, kumbaga makaraos lang sa pag-aaral. Yes there are sholarships but you kow what? me myself as a scholar does not feel it.

Oil price hike is so hot today and just yeaterday was the strike of the jeepney drivers. The fare has really increased and that's another factor to be budgeted within our allowances. This issue that we are undergoing right now is one of the effects of the world crisis about oil. I know that these are what's being served for us right now and I know we can do something about it

No One's Immuned

2008-07-25T02:43:00.000-07:00

no one is immuned
by the disease called love...
and it spreads
straight to the heart

if you bleed,
the cure isn't sure
but you try not to be infected
you'll be feeling like you're dead..

Defeated by your Memory

2008-07-20T02:33:00.000-07:00

if only you would hear me
and if only you could see me
are words that I utter on repeatedly

how can I touch you?
I can't find a way to subdue
I wish I was just in the middle
the forgetful one that was a river

have you thought of that logic
that was brought about by this tragic
this sweet pleasure trip
has suddenly gone to its tip

this emotion doesn't release me
how do I stop the fiery
when I know I can't even be ready
to let go of you and me

your mem'ry lives as immortal
despite worst dose of fatal
I wanna be where you are visible
the last remnant of my soul
'coz merely I can't go on

Gunita

2008-07-20T02:23:00.001-07:00

habang ang gabi ay nananahan sa kalangitan
at tahimik ang buong kapaligiran
narito akong nananaghoy
sa pusong walang apoy

pinilt ko ng umidlip
sa duwelo ng puso't isip ngunit
mga tula ang binibigkas
ng mga luhang mapangahas

matagal na ring nasasabik
sa yakap mo na kay higpit
kay tagal ng inaasam-asam
na damdamin ko ri'y pakiramdaman

iba't ibang panaginip
ang bumabalot sa'king malay
anu na nga ba ang buhay
kung wala ang isang
nagbibigay-kulay

sa gabing ito na matala
kahit piraso'y hirap kumatha
ang liwanag at ang silaw
sa'yo lahat nakatanaw

sa lahat ng nais maimprenta
isa lang ang pinakamahalaga
sana iyong maalala
"pinakamamahal kita..."

Assuming

2008-07-20T01:44:00.000-07:00

heartbreak...- the feeling or state of falling to another person w/o the same emotion; often characterized by "assuming..."

Assuming is one of the words to avoid that is because if you keep on holding to that principle then you'll be the one to end up hurting.. to assume for something wouldn't be a fact so we need to find a way to free ourselves from that. Always try not to because it really can hurt you. When you feel unsure then try to ask..!

Rejected!! Awtz!

2008-07-18T05:46:00.000-07:00

ok, i know what you are thinking.. you think that i was rejected by someone, a guy out there.. but no that's not what i'm referring to here.. it's not about lovelife(do i have that??)

i am talking about my "assignment". i would say that my assignment in a certain subject was not accepted by our teacher because of my being "late". OMG! i worked hard on it. but my teacher didn't even bother to take it.. how sad.. i was really depressed by that incident. i must admit i was not able to answer all that activities but hey pls. try to consider my "effort" and "time" when i was doing it. and i must also say that i've got my mistake when i entered late. but you know what? the interval was just a minute... oh,i don't want to recall that anymore.

anyways, next time i won't do that anymore. (coming late or doing of assignment?? hehe)

Why does it Happen ( over again???)

2008-07-18T05:09:00.000-07:00

Cute smiles
over again
Eye to eye contacts
over again
Simple hello's and hi's
over again
Sweet messages
over again
Long hours on the phone
over again
Daydreamings
over again...

Walks in the rain
over again
Unplanned dates
over again
Shared laughters
over again
Perfect moments
over again
"Extra-closeness"
over again...

Sleepless nights
over again
Confused minds
over again
hard times
over again
less talks, delayed compromises
over again...

Unsaid feelings, sad goodbyes
over again
Why does it all Happen
over and over again.

On that Unhidden Lane

2008-07-18T04:57:00.000-07:00

My pen sharpened
say to mark the jumbled words
tapping on the desk
on the floor my eyes do rest

A floating spirit
is waht the heart is
not to battle the mind
then the emotion comes in

Finding place to grow
to collect and meditate
th emptiness was a secret
that angels do not forget

Thoughts of different thoughts
fool the seeker's heart
mesmerize than realize
does purity still count?

True honest feelings
aroused by serendipity
not above the line
'coz certainty does not appear

most beautiful things simply resides
behind the fallacy of the crowd
doesn't notice what's not shown
but it denies the love...